


Smart Phones and Dumb Boys

by MoonShineD



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, My first fic on my own
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 12:03:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15994826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonShineD/pseuds/MoonShineD
Summary: Three different times John and Sherlock could've met told in text messages.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to da_petty  
> Check out her page www.discoverfanfiction.com  
> A place for readers and authors. Games, prizes, and more.

First Impression

3rd April

(7:45am) *text to ICE* Hello. I found this phone and and figured to text the 'in case of emergency' person to let them know I found it. JW

(7:46am) *text to ICE* Not that it's an emergency. JW

(7:48am) *text to ICE* I guess it could be if the person who owns this phone is important. JW

(7:50am) *text to ICE* Not saying unimportant people don't need their phone for important things. JW

(7:51am) *text to the Brothers phone* Stay there. I will have him retrieve it at once. MH

(7:53am) *text to ICE* Can't do. Leaving soon. I will give it to the clerk. Blonde one. Somewhat cute. JW

(7:59am) *text to Brother's phone* Fine. Give me your number in case of problem. MH

(8am) *text to ICE* Don't think there will be a problem but I guess giving you my number won't hurt. JW

(8:01am) *text to ICE* I forgot to send my number.  
+44 20 7377 7000 JW

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4th April

(2:12am) *text to phone finder* You really thought he was cute? SH

(3am) *text to ??* What? JW

(3:01am) *text to phone finder* The cashier. Cute? Really? SH

(3:30am) *text to ??* What are you going on about? JW

(3:31am) *text to idiot phone finder* The person who you entrusted my phone to. The blonde cashier. Are you normally this slow witted? SH

(3:45am) *text to lost phone* Happy you found it. Yeah, he was cute. Something about the smile. JW

(3:46am) *text to JW* He is paid to smile. SH

(3:46am) *text to JW* I'm not a fan on Blondes. SH

(3:47am) *text to JW* Redheads are even worse. SH

(4:01am) *text to SH* I'm Blonde. JW

(4:02am) *text to Blonde* I know. SH

(4:15am) *text to Shit Head* If you know then why did you say you don't care for Blondes? JW

(4:28am) *text to Blonde* I'm married. SH

(4:28am) *text to Blonde* To my work. SH

(4:29am) *text to Blonde* Married to my work. SH

(4:50am) *text to married Shit Head* Good on you. I am not married to my work but I have been here for 20 hours and now I'm going home. Good night. JW

(5am) *text to JW* We'll talk more later. SH

(5:05am) *text to SH* Why? I found your phone. You thanked me. We're done. JW

(5:06am) *text to JW* I find you interesting. SH

(5:10am) *text to SH* Why? JW

(5:16am) *text to SH* What about me is interesting? JW

(5:49am) *text to Shit Head* Hello? Are you going to respond? JW

(6am) *text to Shit Head* How do you know I'm interesting? I could be boring. JW

(6:10am) *text to Shit Head* Scratch that. I AM boring. JW

(6:34am) *text to Shit Head* Fine. Whatever. Good bye. JW

(6:35am) *text to JW* Good night. SH


	2. You want a what?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Billy

Second Verse

31st Oct

 

(3:06pm) *text to Billy* The body is ready. Bring it right up when you get here. SH

(3:07pm) *text to Billy* Do NOT forget the eyeballs this time. Fresh eyes are not easily obtainable. SH

(3:12pm) *text to body guy* I have contacted the police. They have your number. 

(3:13pm) *text to cop caller* What are you going on about? I have a perfectly sound reason for receiving dead bodies. SH

(6:04pm) *text to cop caller* Thanks to you I just spent hours min dealing with NSY. SH

(6:56pm) *text to SH* I'm well aware. I spoke to a DI and he explained you are a Consultant for NSY. Sorry about the inconvenience but it's my duty to report random people asking me for cadavers. JW

(7pm) *text to JW* Are there people who routinely ask for dead bodies from you? I pay well and am always looking for fresh cadavers. SH

(7:02pm) *text to body buyer* What? No! What makes you think I have access to dead bodies?!?! JW

(7:05pm) *text to won't sell dead bodies* You said you had rarely have random people ask for corpses. That leaves the possibility that you do get asked but not by random people. SH

(7:08pm) *text to body buyer* No. I don't sell, give away, or deliver corpses to anyone. Random or not. JW

(7:12p). *text to useless goldfish* Shame. Let me know if you change your mind. I'm currently looking for a new assistant. SH

(7:18p) *text to SH* Don't you already have an assistant? Billy? JW

(7:24) *text to JW* Not anymore. SH

(7:28p) *text to SH* What happened? JW

(7:30) *text to JW* He forgot the eyeballs. SH


	3. Is it a date or a not-date?

Third Time's the Charm

21st Dec 

(2:35pm) *text to Mary* Hello Mary. Thought I'd see if you were free for dinner tonight. JW

(2:38pm) *text to Mary* Or coffee. JW

(2:40pm) *text to Mary* This is John btw. We met at the pub last night. JW

(2:55pm) *text to John btw* She gave you a fake number. She obviously realized you were clingy and didn't want to offend you. SH

(2:59pm) *text to not Mary* Ta. Thanks for that. JW

(3pm) *text to not Mary* What makes you think I'm needy? JW

(3:02pm) *text to John btw* You not only texted her three times in three minutes but you offered her two choices so she could opt for the more casual one. You reminded her of your name so you assume she often gives her number out yet you still tried to reach her. Finally, and most telling, you responded after you knew this wasn't her number. SH

(3:05pm) *text to SH* That's brilliant. JW

(3:09pm) *text to JW* Really? You think so? SH

(3:11pm) *text to SH* Yes. Why? JW

(3:14pm) *text to JW* That's not what most people say. SH

(3:15) *text to SH* What do most people say? JW

(3:24pm) *text to JW* Piss off. SH

(3:30pm) *text to sh* Sorry. Was just a question. I won't bother you again. JW

(3:32pm) *text to JH* ?? SH

(3:35pm) *text to JH* Don't be an idiot. I wasn't telling you to piss off. I was telling you what most people say. They tell me to piss off. SH

(3:39pm) *text to SH* Oh. Ok. That makes sense. JW

(3:45pm) *text to SH* My offer still stands* JW

(4:06pm) *text to JW* What offer? SH

(4:10pm) *text to SH* About dinner or coffee tonight. JW

(4:12pm) *text to JW* Reason four to tell how clingy you are. SH

(4:15pm) *text to SH* Is that a no then? JW

(4:16pm) *text to JW* Angelo's. 7pm. This is not a date. SH

(4:19pm) *text to SH* No worries. It's only a date if they put a candle on the table. JW


End file.
